Every season brings its own worries. Summer is no exception. But how can we protect ourselves from the stress and unrealistic expectations of this time of year?
Until now, the Christmas holidays were the undisputed favourite for the most stressful time of year, but according to the latest research, the start of summer is taking their place. That is why it is important to know what is causing us all this discomfort without us even realising it.
According to Dr Mariana Kilburn, a therapist at the Vogel Health Centre in London, there are several reasons for this: fewer hours of sleep due to the heat and noise, excessive alcohol consumption and partying, and dehydration. But this has been the case since the dawn of time – what’s new? There is one completely different factor that turns out to be decisive: social pressure and comparing oneself to others.
And the reason for this is that, to make the most of the summer, we have to bare all. Literally! In the park, on the streets, at the sports ground, at work, at a wedding or an outdoor party, at the swimming pool, on the beach. Clothes, make-up and accessories take a back seat to our skin and the natural contours of our bodies. And these days it’s even more stressful, because as well as the people we’re with, we’re on display to a much wider audience. We’re all constantly taking photos, then sharing them with friends and family, posting them on Facebook, and sending them to each other via Viber.
And we’re constantly comparing ourselves. Who’s more attractive, richer, slimmer, more cheerful, and so on. But photos only show our physical characteristics, don’t they?
What, though, makes us feel confident and beautiful?
Some say beauty lies in one’s charisma. Others believe it lies in health: smooth skin, lush hair. For others still, it is about classic, ideal proportions. Or perhaps it is a matter of fashion – being voluptuous in the Renaissance, being flat-chested in the 1990s. Smaller, or larger. In ancient Egypt, women would cinch their chests with sashes, as it was believed that a large bust was a sign of bad taste. Japanese women wore tight shoes to prevent their feet from growing. And in Africa, they attached weights to their earlobes in the hope that their ears would reach at least as far as their shoulders. Such was the aesthetic. Today, we insert silicone implants to enlarge one part of the body, whilst ‚sucking out‘ fat to reduce another.
Almost all of us agree that beauty lies in the symmetry of the individual parts in relation to one another and to the whole. This is what the eye recognises in visible things. But let us consider what this means. Only a complex composition can be beautiful; never something devoid of constituent parts. Only a whole. Several parts will possess beauty, not in and of themselves, but only when they work together to create something more significant. And yet, overall beauty requires beauty in the details. Or so Plotinus asserts in his *Enneads*: it cannot be built upon ugliness or artificiality; its law must flow through all its parts.
But does that mean we have to have it all? And be perfect at everything, all the time – and is that even possible? Should we have large or small breasts? Small or large ears? Should we be slim or curvy? If only we could have a different body for every fashion trend, for every occasion – just like clothes hanging in a wardrobe.
But we only have one body. For our whole life.
Can a single element change the way we look? Or at least the way we feel.
When we look at another person, we don’t analyse all their pros and cons; instead, we’re struck by one or, at most, two things. And usually, this is the aspect that the person themselves brings to the fore. A nice smile. Smooth skin. Beautiful hair. A nice outfit. Their mood. But the reverse is also true: the first thing that will strike us is what the person is trying to hide or hates about themselves.
We don’t need everything about ourselves to be perfect; it’s enough to have one or two things that set us apart and give us confidence. And that sounds like a manageable task if we want to get rid of the discomfort we cause ourselves.
When Paul Ekman, a pioneer in the study of emotions, created his „atlas of emotions“, he discovered a direct link between them and our facial expressions. We are most likely to give away what we are trying to hide – just like an inexperienced poker player. Conversely, if we feel good, we will fill the environment around us with that emotion.
Beauty is communication. The way we perceive ourselves influences the way the world around us perceives us too. Have you ever had a brilliant day simply because you went out in a good mood, thanks to something small? A new accessory, a generous reading on the scales, a lovely hairstyle, glowing skin.
Here at Body Aesthetics, we want to continue seeing our clients leave our studio feeling exactly like that. And we’re not claiming that we can solve every problem, nor that we can work miracles overnight. But we can help with one important detail. Or two.
The material HOW CAN WE AVOID STRESS THIS SUMMER? was first published on Body Aesthetics.
